my theory of relativity (or edison's 2001)
my whole life i've been told that keeping a journal, or personal history, would be of great value. i've started more times than i can remember, but i have always petered out before long. i love my computer, so i'm hoping this new format will help with the ability to be consistent. here's hoping.
in the "rule of four" by ian caldwell and dustin thomason i found a sentence that has occupied my mind for some time: "it was the strange but predictable consequence of their friendship that it left them more solitary than when they began." when i reflect on the history of my friendships, i can only find one person with whom i really am close after proximity was removed. i suppose that in some way i regret the loss of familiarity in these other relationships ;but, generally speaking, i don't really notice the absence. i think that is the strangest part of it all. the return to my natural state of solitary confinement is one that virtually goes unnoticed. i don't mean to imply that i am not friendly with these who have previously held such seemingly irreplaceable positions in my life. i am merely observing that their places of necessity always seem to dissipate.
wyatt earp was a true believer in the infallibility of the family bond. when it really came down to it, the only persons in whom he would place unwavering trust were his family (ok doc holliday,too.) i feel vaguely similar. my family are the ones whose positions in my life will never diminish.
a story of my life would have to begin with my wife and son. i love them without reservation. nothing i do is replete unless it includes them in some fashion. i love to be with them, or to talk to them, or just to remember something we shared. perhaps one day i will learn the appropriate words to tell them how much i need them. for now, these will have to suffice.
in the "rule of four" by ian caldwell and dustin thomason i found a sentence that has occupied my mind for some time: "it was the strange but predictable consequence of their friendship that it left them more solitary than when they began." when i reflect on the history of my friendships, i can only find one person with whom i really am close after proximity was removed. i suppose that in some way i regret the loss of familiarity in these other relationships ;but, generally speaking, i don't really notice the absence. i think that is the strangest part of it all. the return to my natural state of solitary confinement is one that virtually goes unnoticed. i don't mean to imply that i am not friendly with these who have previously held such seemingly irreplaceable positions in my life. i am merely observing that their places of necessity always seem to dissipate.
wyatt earp was a true believer in the infallibility of the family bond. when it really came down to it, the only persons in whom he would place unwavering trust were his family (ok doc holliday,too.) i feel vaguely similar. my family are the ones whose positions in my life will never diminish.
a story of my life would have to begin with my wife and son. i love them without reservation. nothing i do is replete unless it includes them in some fashion. i love to be with them, or to talk to them, or just to remember something we shared. perhaps one day i will learn the appropriate words to tell them how much i need them. for now, these will have to suffice.
posted by cm at 9/27/2005
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