book 'em dan-o!

i am the first to admit that i am a (semi)recovering book snob.

for the longest time, the only thing i would read was non-fiction. in my library one would primarily find books relating to the american west frontier, sports, or the civil war. i would see people reading the latest michael crichton or john grisham offering and think, "oh, how fun it must be to be caught up in literary pop culture." as for me, i had no desire to be a low-brow, band-wagon fiction reader. fiction best sellers were well beneath me.

this thinking remained with me for a long while, until one december we went to colorado to visit family. while visiting my aunt rosie, she offered to lend me her copy of a book written by tony hillerman. i had heard of this author before, and had been interested in reading some of his material; but, i could never remember his name when i was at a book store. mr. hillerman writes mystery novels set on the navajo reservation of arizona, utah, and new mexico. this appealed to me greatly due to my previous residence on the reservation. i took her up on her offer. it was a great collection. the stories were fun and easy to read. they were well researched and full of historical, cultural, and political analysis. i became aware that there was a chance that my snobbery was foolish and not well-founded...perhaps i was missing out on some fun reading as a result of my pretension.

i decided to change my ways. sure, most of my purchases are still histories or biographies. it should be this way, because this is what interests me; but, i have read (and purchased) a healthy amount of fiction in the most recent 10 years. last week i was tested anew. i determined to read "the count of monte cristo." i believe i read it in middle school, but haven't touched it since. accordingly, i went down to half-price books in search of my prize. i found two versions. one was unabridged, and appeared to be thicker than "war and peace." i prefer the unabridged; but, this looked to be too much for my needs. the second choice offered was an abridged version printed after the release of the 2002 disney movie of the same title. what to do? nothing screams reactionary bourgeois reader like a book with a movie poster reprinted as its cover. i couldn't help myself. despite the howling protests in my head, i took the best seller version to the counter and paid. i just couldn't bear to face the 1500 pages of the original. 500 is plenty for me. my solace comes from the fact that this version is an abridgement of the original text-not a copy of the screen play. that is something i could never do.

nevertheless, i like a little rebellion now and then.

they act as if they knew the man

i just finished watching a memorial service for steve irwin - the crocodile hunter. actually, i saw only the last 15 minutes, because i had just gotten home from a basketball game. the service was quite odd. it seemed to be held in an amphitheater at the zoo where irwin worked. i believe it was conducted by one of the guys from the "wiggles." there was a video montage of cameron diaz and justin timberlake and others saying "g'day" and "mate." did they know him? i don't know. the stands were filled with people in shorts and t-shirts crying for this man i'm sure they barely knew. the crowd were crying, clapping, singing, laughing. it was a little surreal.

don't get me wrong. i am not attempting to denigrate the fashion in which one's life is viewed, celebrated, or remembered by others. unfortunately, i have been to many funerals in my life...for aunts, uncles, grandparents, classmates, friends, a sister-in-law, and my son. one thing i have learned in these many experiences is that mourning is deeply personal. it is a singular expression unique to the individual. it also sucks.

put me down as a crocodile hunter fan. i don't pretend that i watched his show too often; but, it was fun to watch when i did. that said, people fooling around in the environment of a wild animal has always made me uncomfortable. what makes you think the dolphins want you to swim with them? i know i don't want you putting your dirty hands on my nose, why should they be any different? almost equally disturbing to me are zoos. even sea world (we get season passes every year) gives me pause. these animals weren't created to be confined in areas as restrictive as those generally provided. just because these particular animals were born into captivity and don't know any better seems a poor excuse to me. yes, they appear to be well taken care of; but, that's not the point. every year when we are at sea world, one of the trainers will go to great lengths to teach us that the reason these killer whales interact with them so personally is due to the bond of love which has developed between the whale and the individual trainer. this may be true. if it is, can someone explain to me what the big bucket of fish is for?...and why the animal needs a handful of fish after every trick? come on.

they also like to explain to me that the animals aren't doing "tricks." they are performing "behaviors." additionally, i am told that the animals only perform behaviors that are inherent to their species when in the wild. really? at sea world, i have seen a walrus doing sit-ups, a otter drink a 7-up, and a killer whale stick out his tongue for a picture. seriously, how dumb do they think i am?

here is what steve irwin did. he confirmed the thinking that i have that although animals in captivity are in a less than ideal situation; their sad and restricted lives serve a larger purpose. they allow the general populous to observe these beautiful creatures in an environment conducive to large-scale interaction. the advantage here is that it forces us to see the magnificence of a part of the world that is slowly being destroyed. he said that when we appreciate these animals, we begin to love them, and we will be less likely to destroy that which we love.

i hope he was right.

river boys

i just got home from the river. jackson and i have made it a habit to go down to the san marcos river to cool off.

growing up in wimberley, we had a few choices when it came to swimming. sure, the lodge was o.k.; the pro shop was pretty cool because that's where robin wiley hung out; the spa was the best because we could jump off of the high dive and then stroll on over to jacob's well. as for me, the pools never held alot of sway...especially the public pool in san marcos. it always seemed to contain too much "lemonade" and the potential for "snickers bars" was always in the back of my mind.

i always preferred the rope swing, or blue hole, or the low-water bridge, or 7A, the marina, or fischer road, or just driving to san marcos or camp ben to jump in the river there. the chute was always fun. i always thought the river was a more exciting place to cool off. there were swings, or tunnels, or trees from which to jump, or zip-lines, or cliffs, or something that would up the adventure level just a bit more than a diving board. the river was always free, and the closest we ever got to adult supervision was when one of the reefs would show up drunk and try to cut the line.

my wife, on the other hand, is not excited about swimming in natural waters. well, saying it that way minimizes her reluctance to get in a river, or lake, or creek. as such, i have had to try to brainwash jman into understanding that natural water is the best place to rejuvenate. artificial swimming areas are nice in a pinch, but they certainly don't compare.

i think it's working. in a couple of weeks, were going out to balmorhea. we can't wait.

there's a reason it's a stereotype

this is the opening weekend of college football. i love it. tonight, i am lying on the bed, and flipping back and forth between the ou/uab game, the notre dame/georgia tech game, and the usc/arkansas game. this is exactly the situation for which a remote control was designed. thank you, whoever you are.

i also had begun to forget something i know to be important: i hate the oklahoma sooners. i hate their colors. i hate their stupid song. i hate that wagon thing they drive around. i hate their toothless fans. most of all i hate their classless players. what has ever come out of oklahoma that benefited anyone? their school and state is a celebration of stealing land from the indigenous tribes. i hope you're proud.

i hate them unlike any other, and ever will this feeling burn.